I was raised ‘in church’ and ended up accepting ordination within the United Church of Canada in the mid 1970’s. Back then everything seemed possible. Many churches were exciting and questioning communities of faith. The trend soon changed. Organized Christianity went one way and I went another. I lasted twenty years – should have quite much sooner.

This book reflects where I was in 2016. I had recovered most of my energy after a severe bout of depression but was not able to express my faith and Calling in churches. To me, Christianity had become something completely different than the communities and dreams of Jesus of Nazareth. That is still how I see things.

Things don’t change gradually. The ancient paradigm (cycle) of life to death to life to death is much more likely than gradual change. In this book I look at history, trying to recognize this reality, pointing out times of ‘death’ and ‘new life’ in the journey of ‘The Church’.